Thursday, April 19, 2012

Letter to My Teenage Daughter

Dear Daughter,

I know that it is hard to believe that one day you will be a teenager, but you will.  That day scares me more than anything because it means that you are that much closer to leaving.  But for now, while you are still little (well, sort of little), I think I need to write down some things that you need to know about being a teenager.  I need to do this now before you turn into one and I lose my temper and my mind and forget the important points I wanted to make.

1.  Being a teenager is nothing like it is in the movies, or in a Taylor Swift video.  If you are considered a geek or a nerd, embrace it, do not be embarrassed of it and feel the need to be something you are not.  If you prefer to stay at home and read or study instead of riding around in the back of someone's pick up truck or driving too fast down a winding road, please stay home.  The people who judge you for it do not matter, and at least I will know that you are going to live to make it to college.  If boys make fun of you for being a loser, do not listen to them because you do not want to be with that kind of boy anyway.  If girls make fun of you for being who you are, you do not need them for friends so forget them.  If they call you ugly, just know that they are the ones who are ugly, especially on in the inside.  Be who you are and know that people will love you for that.

2.  If you do have a boyfriend (assuming your dad lets you get away with that), know that [usually] it is not the one you will be with forever (no matter what the boy says because believe me, he will try to convince you otherwise; just try to be smarter than he is).  It is high school.  High school ends and so do relationships.  I know you might feel like it is the end of the world, but it isn't.  You will meet more, hopefully ones that I approve of.  If you have to wait three years to have a date to a dance, it is ok, we will go out and buy you some new shoes so you will forget about it. Above all, don't worry about it, there are more important things even though you probably will not realize it at the time.

3.  Friends are human, they will let you down.  They will let you down more than once, and you will probably let them down at some point too.  If you are real friends, you will eventually overcome this.  If you weren't real friends, it is probably better to find out now and break ties for good.  I will take you for ice cream with all the toppings that you want and you won't even remember their names.

4.  Bad things happen sometimes.  I hope these things never happen to you or someone you know, but know if they do, I will always be there for you no matter what because I can never not love you.

5.  We may not always get along.  You may think you hate me or that I hate you, but I don't.  When you think this, I will bring out all of our family pictures and talk about how proud I will always be of you, even if you make bad decisions.  It's the decision, not you, that I am not fond of.

Above all, just be yourself and not who society, pop culture, friends, peers, or whoever else wants you to be. 

Mom (because I am sure by now you will no longer call me "Mommy", sniff)


  1. I'm in tears after reading this. My daughter turns sixteen in a few months. You have inspired me to write her a letter filled with wisdom and love. I found you from the linky hop and so glad I did.


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